Failing At Being A Grown Up and everything else

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Do you ever feel messy? That your life is a series of small fires that are partially burning but not yet under control? At any moment any unexpected wind could turn it all into a wild brush fire that eats away acres of land…..no? Maybe it’s just me struggling in the land of the grown ups.

The weekend ate me alive. Friday – quick drinks with a colleague taking a new job. Run home for 6pm dinner with friends & their adorable 3 year old. Saturday – 6 mile run, grill for my Dad and off to a soccer match ( Father’s Day gift) after I headed to the SJC. Sunday – Prepped for my cousins baby shower hosted by my mama (8 -1). Baby shower 1-7pm equals exhaustion!!!

I miss my Grandma and I’m still feeling the grief. My lovely mama is out of the bell jar but its still hard for her. I hate seeing her in pain it just breaks my heart.

My grief ran away with my credit card and I have been not living within my means…. Sigh…fail in land of the grown ups. This weekend included. I need to get back on track financially and reassess my long term goals. Grown ups need to retire apparently that involves savings and being debt free. I need to look at the damage and post Mexico really start to tackle that shizz. Step one admit the problem.

Work is work. Some parts I love other parts drive me insane on top of the fact I’m undeniably behind.

I guess it’s just one of those days where it feels like I’m failing at everything. I want to turn it all around but I get overwhelmed or tacked by another unexpected wave of disaster. 2014 is just kicking my ass and it sucks.

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I still want to be all sunshine or mostly sunshine but it’s harder than it looks. So for tonight I’m just going to try and count my blessings and know I have a date with a beautiful run and hot coffee in the morning.

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I’m looking forward to the quiet and hoping to find a little grace out there. I’m making mistakes but I’m getting up and trying each day. I pray that counts for something.

Good night besos,
lbg

made with iPhone lurve

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7 thoughts on “Failing At Being A Grown Up and everything else

    • Thanks, Kathy. Each day is a fresh start and new try, I just need to get my mind there. I’m lucky to have this little space on the web to vent it out. Sometimes we’re just not where we want to be…I know it’s not a forever place but sometimes it’s very challenging to move forward. Thanks for the love, mujer. XOXO

  1. Pingback: WED HUMP OR NOT PUNCHING ANYONE IN THE FACE! | The Hot Mess Express

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